whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
