He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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