Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
