And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize