This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
