You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
