what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
