So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
