I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
