my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
My vagina just clenched in fear
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
