And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
