I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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