RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Houston, we have a squirter
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
