Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
