in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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