I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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