mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Vodka?
Forever.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
