She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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