butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
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