Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
