He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
