? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
