I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
