Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
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