yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
