Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
