My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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