what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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