Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
