i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
