When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
