Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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