Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
