Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
