Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
