therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
