Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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