remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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