I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
