this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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