elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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