Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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