So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
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