It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
