When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Did you pee in the oven last night??
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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