Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Randomize
