You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize
