I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
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