Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My ass is underappreciated
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
