on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
